Penning My Thoughts on a Pen

Worldly possession kills.
It kills friendship and I was monumentally ashamed of myself.

I just bought a pen, wet blue ink, with 0.5m point for under RM5.00. It is a good pen, and being new, I carried it around with me all the time.

Then there was this meeting yesterday and a friend snatched it away. I was puzzled, then mad. The meeting was at her place, she could have brought her pen. Couldn’t she brought one herself? I was then left with a pen which ink almost finishing. And it was black! I can’t be writing in Black, I am a BLUE girl!!

That went for twenty minutes.

Then I took a look at her across the table and remember the blue, tip point Faber Castell pen she has. She has like a full box of it, she bought them herself I think, I didn’t even ask. I remember how happily she was giving it away whenever people commented how nice it is to write with it. I had two. I saw other girls with the pen, too, which surely came from her.

Then it hit me right there!

How could I be so calculative towards her borrowing my pen? I had another to write on.

How could I behave that way with a person whose heart is so generous?

I was so ashamed of myself I could just kick myself out from the room.

Then I quietly took a cup of coffee for her. A silent apology.

A friendship was almost broken. Over a pen. But a Faber Castell kicked in, and a friendship was saved.

(eee rasa bodoh)

Congratulations Pak Ngah Arris

Today is Arris graduation day. Apak and Mak slept over (after a day out at Nilai yesterday, I bought myself three pairs of kain!) and drove early morning to Unisel at Batang Berjuntai.
He was dressed in red robe. We arrived when they were finally out from the Hall. I quickly shoved him into the Hall to take some picture with the Man's D50 SLR Nikon. Then we took some pictures around as family. I thought I saw tears in his eyes when both Apak and Mak took the picture with him. Three weeks before, his girlfriend of three years just got married. It broke his heart, I know, but he went anyway to the wedding.
At the age of 28, he got his first degree, finally. Alhamdullilah. We knew time wasn't at his side. He took four years to complete his Diploma, was unemployed for almost three years, then took his first degree at Unisel in management.
For me, he was always the brightest boy in the family during childhood. He talked fast and thought fast, too. I think it was his high school that killed his passion, his ideas.
Anyway, past is passed. He is now having a stable job, paycheque was a mere RM1k but he survives. He is the dearest Uncle to my little Azamzikry. In fact, azikry adores him to bits. That what matters, in the end, having a child looks up to you and greets you with screams everytime you come home.
I am just glad that he is home with me, that he had safely graduated, that we are still here for each other.

Clipperseep is listening to: Widuri by Bob Totupuli at In Law's House. Bob is Papa's favorite.
Clipperseep has read the headline today:the RTD is allowing people to personalized their car plate no. I remembered one Mitsubishi Eclipse at IUPUI before with a reg no of 4UNVME (For You To Envy Me). Tot it was a girl car

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The much talked about newly weds in town

The much talked about newly weds in town : Siti Nurhaliza and Datuk Khalid.

Much has said about them. The latest email I received was about the love bite on her neck. Then about her being ‘charmed’ by her current husband, about how charm has turned her into someone rude and forceful towards the parents. About parents not blessing the marriage.

Sigh..

Couldn’t just people leave the two alone. They are married. And be done with it.

People can never stop wondering about her life, how is she coping with the new role, how is the husband supporting her career. People can’t wait to hear the news of her being pregnant, about whether she’ll prefer a boy or a girl, about what are the name choices she has, would she breastfeed, would she have nannies.

Imagine if your journey to marriage and motherhood are on front pages, almost every week.

Following are the questions they used to ask Siti, and ask yourselves on how would you answer them?

Why do you choose him to be your husband?
What are the values he has?
What are his physical attributes that compelled you to love him?
How long have you been in love with him?
Don’t you think that is too short / too long to get married? Why not married later / sooner?
When will you have your first baby?
What do you think of his parents? What does he think of yours?
Will you still work after getting married?

I’m just glad to be married to the Man.





Clipperseep is listening to: Shania Twain

Another Baby?

The Man has started his bowling league back. I abide.

So, there was mommy yesterday night, with the Greatest Kid On Earth at home, attending to his games of cars and tickles while trying to watch Failure to Launch (Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew McCoughnehey sp??). When he rubbed his eyes repeatedly, I brought him upstairs, changed him and put him to bed. He, as always, twirled around the bed but hands searching mine to hug him.

He, also, didn't wanna go home when Daddy picked him up from Acik's House. He said, 'Tanak..Tanak Daddy.. Mommy?'..

Mommy's boy......

Anyway, The Man has rolled his plan for the Second Greatest Kid On Earth. He said, the second shall be in Standard One when the First one is in Standard Four, at least. So, if Azam Zikry was born in 2004, the second baby get to be born in 2007, meaning I have to conceive .. lemme count.... NOW!!!!

I hesitated to answer, to think or even to conceive. Sex is now postponed or deferred or avoided at 100% all of the time (even with the IUD inside me).

When I looked hard at Azam Zikry's face, I wonder whether I could love another as much as I love him. I wonder whether I would do fair to the second one since I have loved this one so much. I wonder whether I could spend as much time coloring, tickling, dancing and hugging Azam Zikry when his baby sister popped out. ( But I do want a girl.... sigh.... ) I wonder whether Azam Zikry will feel left out, or he'll poke his sister's cheeck continuously to get my attention. I wonder whether I could still juggle with home cleaning, cooking, laundry after coming home at 5:30.

(So, gartblue, how did you do it?)

Or shall I just stop wondering and just do it?

I really wanna do the right thing. I don't wanna spend nine months eyeing the clothes I can't wear, the shoes I can't wear and the caffeine I can't have, feeling whether that was the right thing to do.

Being a super loving mommy makes this hard.